Thank you for Peaches seeming improved and for a new diagnosis that’s more manageable. (It went from brain tumor to slipped disc.)

Thank you for thoughts on suffering, illness, and death. Thinking about why an innocent creature like Peaches has to suffer set them rolling. 

I re-wondered an oldie but goodie—if illness and death really have as much inherent suffering as I’d assumed. What if society, conventions, gut reactions, rumination, egos paint them as horrible things when really they’re natural processes that aren’t awful per se? It’s possible nature didn’t make mortality tragic; we did. (Think of the notion of no birth, no death and of the second arrow.)

So I decided to take a different (silly) perspective. Regardless of how long Peaches has left, we’ll make the best of it and keep her as comfy as possible. I’ll view her inevitable transition as graduation from the school of life where we’ve shared a dorm room. Neither of us know where she’ll end up after the strain of final exams, the stress of graduation. But it’s all part of the deal. We’ll relish our remaining moments; if she leaves first, I’ll try to see her as not ending but moving on.

Thank you for fun Bertrand Russell quotes (mined from a less than politically correct book, The Conquest of Happiness). 

On love: “For the love that has been purged by gentleness of all tendency towards tyranny can give a joy more exquisite, more tender, more capable of transmuting the base metal of daily life into the pure gold of mystic ecstasy, than any emotion that is possible to the man still fighting and struggling to maintain his ascendancy in this slippery world.”

On work and purpose: “A little work directed to a good end is better than a great deal of work directed to a bad end, though the apostles of the strenuous life seem to think otherwise.”

On resilience: “A man of adequate vitality and zest will surmount all misfortunes by the emergence after each blow of an interest in life and the world which cannot be narrowed down so much as to make one loss fatal.”

On attaining happiness: “Happiness is not, except in very rare cases, something that drops into the mouth, like a ripe fruit, by the mere operation of fortunate circumstances.” Further, “Happiness must be, for most men and women, an achievement rather than a gift of the gods, and in this achievement effort, both inward and outward, must play a great part.”

On enduring hope: “Hope which is to be unconquerable must be large and impersonal.” And then, “In a thousand ways the failure of purely personal hopes may be unavoidable, but if personal aims have been part of larger hopes for humanity, there is not the same utter defeat when failure comes.”

Thank you for new year’s resolutions. Here are mine for this year: Write more letters and send more messages. Treat people kindly (focus on listening, especially). Dance.

I also found a list of resolutions from 2010 to 2015. They, too, are embarrassing but may be helpful or entertaining to read:

2010 - Don’t pick on you. Be gracious. Smell yummy. Be open, sharing with people (trust). Knit. Dance.

2011 - Help people to feel more comfy around you. Try to feel more comfy around others. Take a dance class. Write 1x/week.

2012 - Appreciate friendships, good times, blessings while they’re here.

2013 - Be more honest. Try to feel more comfy expressing dissent. Meditate more.

2014 - Be gentler to yourself (challenges faced). Approach interactions with a view of what you have to offer others. Surf more.

2015 - Be a servant. Fight climate change.

Thank you for book suggestions from loved ones. The read promises at the very least to add understanding of the one who recommends it.

Thank you for cozy, relaxed, candle-lit holidays.

Thank you for RP’s advice and kindness during our chat Christmas evening. 

Thank you for women supporting women.

Thank you for a quarter, fifty cents, and a dollar. 

Thank you for family. Thank you for sisters who inspire.

Thank you for DA and his family staying warm and safe in a snowstorm.

Thank you for MK teaching by example what it means to give unconditional support and acceptance.

Thank you for LF’s sappy text message read at just the right time. Thank you for her strength with compassion. Thank you for our maturity and friendship evolving.

Thank you for taps of raindrops that don’t clamor but make themselves known. 

Thank you for shelter.

Thank you for the opportunity of a new year to take stock of the old and make fresh starts. Let’s look with compassion on the past. Its lessons will equip us to thrive. 

Wishing you a 2023 of wellness and progress! Please enjoy rest to sustain your endeavors and forgiveness as cushion when they fall short. May your heart’s truth find expression. Set free with vulnerability, accepted in love, our truths will mend us and the world <3