Thank you for encouragement to one’s self. It helps to have yourself as your cheerleader and support system.

Thank you for relationships we cultivate with ourselves that transform self hatred. Stubborn efforts and forgiveness help.

Thank you for our responses to life’s blows mitigating their impact and in some cases transforming it.

Thank you for the connection between self loathing and arrogance, because it means I can address both together. They’re jointly tied to either-or, individualistic thinking. When the stark individual extremes melt into a collective gray, I realize, one, that I’m no better than people who do wrong. (My arrogance subsides.) And two, that I’m no worse than people who do right. (My self-loathing subsides.) I do good, and I cause hurt. I falter and succeed. That’s human.

Exploring connections shows we are universally tied to circumstances, histories, nature, habits. If I look deeply, I discern my regrets in your seemingly unrelated wrongdoings. And I perceive my triumphs when I view your success. Further, “success” or “failure” is never the whole story. They’re a package deal, too. Often a regret informs an achievement. Or what seems a success instead causes suffering. 

Mistakes and suffering give (shared) lessons on the path to well being. None of us walk that path alone. No one stumbles without obstacles, even if they’re within or invisible. Likewise, no one rises without help. So remorse needn’t devolve to shame and self loathing; victory or virtue needn’t overshoot to pride and arrogance. Practice looking brings equanimity. (It’s just a thought. My head is starting to hurt so maybe these ramblings are a little kooky.)

Thank you for my dad’s support years after he left us.

Thank you for ideas while meditating.

Thank you for Peaches’ surgery and recovery going well, and for the professionals who gave her care.

Thank you for huge, nourishing breakfasts.

Thank you for a sunny day.

Thank you for a fridge filled with whole foods.

Thank you for clear skin.

Thank you for clean water abundantly available.

Thank you for early morning routines.

Thank you for how good it feels to meditate.

Thank you for houseplants adding joy and calm when we rest our gaze on them.

Thank you for large windows to let in bright sunlight.

Thank you for determination to love.

Thank you for rest.

Thank you for, “The energy of stopping is very powerful” (Thich Nhat Hanh). I’d add that awareness (of breath, thoughts, feelings, sensations, etc.) makes stopping not simply ceasing one thing but also taking up another.

Thank you for the smell of coffee.

Thank you for memories of Paris.

Thank you for it’s never too late. The past two years (mostly in CA) have seen me establish more—and more genuine—social ties than ever before. This happened without pushing or purpose. It’s a stark contrast to the days (esp. in grad school) when social anxiety consumed me. Eye contact with male peers sparked embarrassment. I could barely speak in class or at work. Social gatherings terrified me. And I constantly pressured myself to be less shy. 

Again, focusing not on the problem but on self-care practices and nourishing environments (plus having luck) helped. My MO shifted from avoidance to approach. I became more accepting of me, which gave ease around others; the receding need to quell turmoil left space for curiosity toward lives and experiences. Social anxiety therapy did not accomplish that. Nor did pressuring myself to change. Seeking general wellness through a variety of specific practices helped.

Thank you for when we have the peace of mind to walk tall.

Thank you for unfulfilled dreams. Life looks nothing like I thought it should. I’ve received countless enormous gifts that weren’t asked for, but a lot of what I used to want, what society and ego told me were important, I never received. With those disappointments came a nudge toward gratitude for what I did have and a call to accept more responsibility for my happiness—I’m glimpsing a truer meaning of it.

Thank you for the plain talk of Dr. Robynne Chutkan on the Rich Roll Podcast, particularly about the link between medications and the state of our gut microbiome.

Thank you for fermented foods and diverse plant foods, for how their consumption increases our physical and mental wellness.

Thank you for when we appreciate the times we’re not going under. To be afloat in rough waters is a feat.

Thank you for the saying, “This is a happy moment,” that Sister True Dedication shared on the Ten Percent Happier podcast. 

Thank you for happy little moments to pin with that phrase: morning cuddles with Peach, watching her sniff leaves, tucking into a perfect sweet potato, feeling the breeze on my face, running up the arroyo, seeing sunshine reflected off wings, listening to cheerful music, being enveloped in soft sheets…

Thank you if the above saying helps give a name to your happy moments, so you appreciate them better throughout the day. I hope those moments grow.